Spring and a time for Change

It has been super awesome weather here and I LOVE it! I honestly believe that the weather affects my mood because I have been super happy with the weather at least 60 degrees and sunny. We even have flowers starting to come up (didn't get a pic, cause my camera died). But one thing I love about spring is that it is definitely a time for change, especially this year.
I don't know how many people read my blog, but I am going to spill my guts anyway, so I hope I don't bore you. Here it goes...

To be honest I am TERRIFIED of going to college. What if I have awful roommates? What if I hate my classes, or what if I don't know what I want to do with my life? These questions have been bugging me for a while, and I am so nervous and excited and ready at the same time. How can that be? I have waited all of my life to leave and start my own life, the problem is I have no idea what I am doing. And it hit me more today than ever, but the one thing that I am nervous about is roommates. I don't always get along with girls and I would much rather hang out with boys, but I really am going to need some friends in order for this whole college thing to work. I hate making new friends! I am the worst at it and I never seem to do very well.

I know I am complaining, but I have to get this off of my chest. I get stressed out about money a lot. I like being financially stable, and I am not sure how that will work out in college. What if I can't get a job? That means I can't do what I want? I don't know. I am a girl that likes to do things and buy nice things and I work hard to get it, but what if I can't get it. I don't make a ton of money right now and I am trying to save up for a lot of things. I try hard not to get jealous, but it is sometimes REALLY hard. I know it is good for me to work my way and to earn things that I want, but it is hard. I have had to give up on a lot of things in order to save money for DC and now for my laptop. I am not complaining about my decision to go do DC it was a ton of fun, and totally worth it. I just get stressed out a lot.

I really am excited to be a BYU Cougar! I can't wait to join the other Freshmen and learn to be more independent. I can't wait til graduation (3 months, or 10 weeks, or 47 days; not that I'm counting). I am sorry that this is such a dreary post, but seeing that this blog is more of my journal, I need to write it down.

I hope that whoever reads this has good weather and has a good week! Love you all

-Rach